I WAS JUST AT WAL-MART AND THEN
Little boy: Mommy, why is Wonder Woman not wearing any pants?
The Mom: Because Wonder Woman has amazing thighs and she could crush men with them if they insult her.
Little Boy: I wanna be Wonder Woman.
The Mom: Don't we all.

tvspecial:

every 5 seconds a woman gives birth to a baby. stop this woman.

doctor: sorry sir, we couldnt find a donor so we replaced your heart with a dragon balloon animal
patient: how am i alive

noctstiel:

noctstiel:

1 minute of silence for everyone that can’t attend San Diego Comic Con 2013.

another minute of silence for everyone that can’t attend San Diego Comic Con 2014

"Eyeliner isnt attractive on guys!"

cupcake-fallen-angel:

555-tardis:

majesticaljeff:

offended-fig:

Yeah,

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You know what?

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You’re right.

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Not even

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Slightly

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Attractive.

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What

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Was I

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Thinking?

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You forgot someone very important

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Well he forgot Steve, so it doesn’t really matter.

mostlyv0id-partiallystars:

I see a lot of “Cecil/Carlos brings home a dog/puppy” headcanons, and I guess they’re very cute. However, I’m up to “Dana” in my re-listen marathon, and I can’t help but think that the first attempt at introducing a family pet would more likely go something like “Oh Carlos-! I collected our new dog today.” “That’s wonderful, let’s have a look a- JESUS CHRIST CECIL IS THAT A PIT VIPER” “Wow, Carlos, I didn’t know you were such a whizz at recognising dog breeds!”